A US Coast Guard boatsman mate beat me up!

Many of you have heard my testimony of growing up with a violent and abusive (in every way) father. My 3 sisters and I experienced a very dark childhood until my father was killed in a car wreck when I was fourteen. Our grandparents took custody of us and provide a safe haven for a few years. During these years I was very angry and fancied myself in the marshal arts although I never really had official training. In order to eat I would steal lunches from my classmates. I would often be in school yard and after school fights. We were on welfare most of the time up to when our grandparents took custody of us. I will spare most of the details.

I entered into the US Coast Guard Reserves at 17 years old an angry and confused young man. After graduating from High School I went into active duty service in the USCG. I remember one day at the base club drinking a considerable amount of draft beer. I was bragging about my marshal arts ability when a Boatsman Mate 3rd Class Petty Officer told me he would fight me. He was a big guy that worked on a buoy tender pulling buoys out of the ocean for repair. We faced off and I grabbed his shirt to throw him with a Karate move. I tore all the buttons off his shirt but he did not move! Now he was really mad! I punched but nothing landed. He then turned me into a punching bag. I went down and he advised me that I owed him a new shirt. I paid and that was the very last fight I was in. Although it would be 2 more years before I received Christ I also quit drinking.

We live in a world of control. The strong win. We exalt the great athletic by paying him/her millions of dollars per year. The tall handsome man or sexy women wins the job interview. The smooth talking salesman wins the deal. Sex is exalted to sell products in almost every commercial. Politicians lie to convince us to vote for them so they can take office and decide what we believe by voting based on what they believe. Christians are made to look like fools in secular media.

I believe that religion may have the biggest control issue of all. Most denominational churches have a certain list of values (rules) that you must follow to be part of them. If you believe something outside of their belief system then you are out. In some groups if you go to a movie or a dance you are out. Then there are the non-denominational churches which have their own control issues. The Pastor has a huge gatherings of followers. They will protect their own right not to be a denomination by their own set of rules to follow in the name of being free. If someone disagrees with their list of allowed freedoms then they are out of the freedom club. I am sure you can make your own extensive list of times when you were controlled by someones religious beliefs. I am not saying that there should not be standards but at least we should make those standards based on the grace taught by the Bible. Grace has a built in ability to accomplish what it requires but the law does not.

Here at "Bethel School of Supernatural Ministry" one of our core values is empowerment instead of control. We are learning that the purpose of ministry is to empower. If we are resolving a conflict and the parties do not leave empowered then the goal has not been reached. The conflict may have been solved but it is likely that a new conflict will arise based on the same issue. If you correct someone without empowering them they will not overcome. Any change is only based on control and the inconvenience it would cause them to not submit. When you teach someone to drive and they are always in the passengers seat then they will never learn how to drive. They will know the theory but will not be able to safely put it into practice. We must give them the tools they need to know how to drive and then let them get behind the steering wheel. If you have done a good job empowering then they will have a really good chance of success. If they mess up you are there to help. Later you can sit back, watch your favorite football team, while they run to the store to get some more chips and Pepsi.

This will work at all levels of life. Look at the life of Christ. He always empowered his disciples. This is the message of grace. This grace empowers us to overcome sin. He empowers us to love. If Christian were to begin this Kingdom lifestyle then they would silence their critics. Build a church based on acceptance that empowers people to be more than they thought possible.

Pray over your children and ask... how can I empower them? Where am I trying to control them? Of course the age of your children will dictate the amount of empowerment you can give. You probably should not send your 3 years old out after chips and Pepsi with the family car. I just finished one of our assigned books by Kris Vallotton, "Purity, The New Moral Revolution". This book would empower your teenager to live a pure life and give the most precious gift of virginity to their spouse on their wedding day. Even if they have already messed up then restoration can take place and they can still provide this precious gift on their wedding day.

If you are an employer or supervisor then you can stop controlling and start empowering. Be warned though you will get promotions and be voted boss of the year. This may be more fame than you are ready to handle. Go into business to empower others. Give them the ability to make a living for their family and smile when they come home each night.

Empowerment instead of control is a core value that the body of Christ is starving to learn. Can you image a Christianity that gives honor to people while empowering them to be the best that they can be? How can you empower someone today? One idea is to start listening to them and look for opportunities to bless, honor, and empower them. Maybe you need to increase your tool set to be able to empower others. When a problem arises ask yourself how you can honor and empower in this situation. When doing life always look for an opportunity to empower others.